Airport blogger** revised **

** whilst in the airport I originally posted this via my iPhone. I've gone back and added links as well as cleaned up some typos.


Well, I've been up since 3am. I've be been in ATL (which everyone knows how much I enjoy) for about 8 hrs due to all the rough weather in Philly. Normally I think I'd be pissed, but its been pretty fun actually. I met an awesome older guy, Joe Vitali. Probably in his 70s or 80s as best I could tell. We probably spent 3 or 4 hours chatting. I listened as he told me about growing up in Philly in an Italian neighborhood where his dad owned a grocery store.

"We were all Italian; the whole neighborhood. There was one Irishman though. And when the Americans started moving in my dad told me to go down to Acme Grocery and get some american bread for them to buy." He told me all about his kids, all 9 of them. His boy thats in the Marines. The other son thats a movie star... "He knows martial arts... Revenge of the Ninja is his (Keith Vitali) most famous. He's been in some with that Jakie what's his name too. And on Oprah talking about bullies. Just fished a book too. Its bound so beautifully, he talks about being on Oprah in there too."

He told me about his mom thats 108. And how she and his dad were married in '22 and how he died in '04. "88 years if my math is right."

And then he told me about his own wife of 58 years, and that she'd passed away just 2 weeks ago. Thats why I'm here you know. My five kids in Columbia are renovating my house. When I get back it'll be a new place. I think that'll help."

I hope it does, but I have my doubts. He teared up as he talked about her. The he handed me a piece of paper. "I don't even know why Im showing you this, my son wrote it." it was the eulogy that was read at his wires funeral,you could tell he was planning onkeeping it. It was beautifully written and I almost joined in Joe Vitali's tears.

"What a life, I tell ya! Boy I got a great family, I brag on 'em too much. You should see my granddaughter, she plays on one of those traveling soccer teams... what do you call 'em?? Well anyway, she doesn't just play in South Carolina, but in North Carolina, Tennessee, all over. I'm really gonna enjoy seeing her play."

It was amazing to meet Joe and it was his company that made this a good day.

"Hey sweetheart," Joe says to his sister over the cell phone I'd been helping him learn to use. "Oh nothing much just sitting here with my friend Jason Harmon. We've been passing the time together. He's visiting Philly. "

He smiled at me as he hung up.

News

So... I decided a few months ago to start applying for jobs all over the place to see what would happen. I applied for jobs in Atlanta, L.A., Santa Monica, Chicago and New York. I even applied for one in Kansas City. I got good responses from a good number of the companies; even felt about 90% sure that I'd be moving to Santa Monica. But that fell through. About a week after that I made up my mind; if I haven't gotten a job offer by the time my lease runs out, July 1st, I'm going to up and move somewhere.

I've always wanted to live in NYC so I figured I'd move that direction first and if nothing turned up, then I'd move west. Also since last summer when Gene and Laura moved to Philadelphia they've told me that if I ever want to move up that way, I could stay with them till I got on my feet. So I called Gene and talked about this idea I had of moving to New England and trying to find work in NYC. He and Laura graciously told me I could stay with them while I tried my hand in the New York market.

Well, a couple days after that I found two job postings for a motion design house in Philadelphia. I applied. Within 3o minutes of applying I got a response email. About a week after that email I had a phone interview. About 2 hours after that phone interview I had a plane ticket. So now in about 4 days I'll be flying up to talk with Blue to see if they think I can cut it in the city of brotherly love. I hope I can. Here's a little of what I've been up to since becoming a blog-recluse. Hopefully a website will be coming soon as well.




Jason Harmon Demo v 2.0 from Jason Harmon on Vimeo.

This American Blog

"I saw that movie, and it changed my life," she said. But she didn't say it jokingly which would have been fitting for the conversation. She said it sincerely, quite matter-of-factly actually. "For the first time, I felt understood. Like there were other people like me in the world. There were these weird people who liked all these weird things, and that was the first time I knew I wasn't the only person like that."

I knew exactly where she was coming from. About a month ago I had a similar kind of experience, it wasn't a first... just the first in a while... oddly enough she was there for it.

We were sitting out in front of the bar we all go to on Thursdays. This particular Thursday there were five of us tops. Conversation came quickly and I sat and listened to her give a defense for idealism, "Martin Luther King Jr. was an idealist, he changed things." And as the conversation moved to lighter things, we all considered the question, "Could any bands of our generation have the kind of longevity as the Beatles, or Zeppelin?" "Maybe Nirvana," she says. The conversation meanders on, hitting on this and that, never really settling anywhere for too long. In conversations like that, thoughts move quickly. They're fluid. And as all these thoughts flowed from my mind out into the conversation where they were either met as friend or foe by other former thoughts, there was one that stayed firmly fixed, "I feel understood. I'm not the only person like this." Time and again the things she said, were the exact same things that I was about to say... I wasn't alone in my thoughts, and that was refreshing.

Loneliness sucks... that is in fact a true statement. Its biblical... "It's not good for man to be alone." People in college ministries have a lot of fun with that. Really "witty" guys ask out girls during meetings and quote that scripture. Everyone laughs and thinks that guy is so clever. But they laugh because the heart of that statement, and even the sentiment of that spiritual Casanova on stage hamming it up for a date, resonates with them... It is indeed not good to be alone. That truth is embedded in our hearts, like it or not. We feel the weight of it without thinking about it. But its deeper than just asking girls out, or being asked out right? Sure there's got to be truth in that statement on some romantic, marriage kind of level, but even more simple than that, just on a social level, emotionally platonic, feeling like you're alone in the world sucks.

Well of course that's nothing new, but lately I've been noticing a something else. In those rare occasions when your loneliness is challenged, when you're met with the possibility that there are others like you, something interesting seems to happen; something wonderful. Hope springs. But that's not all that happens, at least not in my experience. That hope that wells up, well, it's not alone.... it seems to consistently be accompanied by disappointment and sometimes even pain.


Today, I'm blatantly ripping off This American Life, a radio show that I'm a huge fan of, so our theme today: Hope and Disappointment. Where there is hope, will disappointment naturally follow? If so why is that? Where does hope come from in the first place, and what causes disappointment? As is typical, I'll be bringing you a couple of stories related to this theme. Act 1 - "The keys of Point Breeze," a story of a recent conversation I had with a good friend of mine who has just moved to Philadelphia. Act 2 - "Dude, where's my church??" The story (hopefully abbreviated) of my experience of being drawn in to the church that I'm currently a member of, and how in the two years that I've been there so much of what drew me in seems to have gotten lost, though I hope I that's not the case.

A disclaimer about both of these stories... they involve other people. I am by no means trying to speak for them or tell their stories for them (though I hope to be accurate in my accounts of what people say)... Im just attempting to recount my experiences of conversations / events, and by doing so explore this idea of hope and disappointment.

The stories are long so I'll do multiple posts.... and I actually will post all of them.

Hope its worth your time.

Well... I thought there would be lots to come from Philly, and there may still be a few posts that find their way on here, but I just haven't really been in the mood to write lately.

I've been thinking a lot about what's true. What is true about people, what defines that truth, how it's recognized. I've felt recently that my affections / loyalties are being fought for. Sometimes the persuasions are subtle, analogies that vilify, stories that are weighted. Other times they are more overt... "we can do this and that when you move here." Others still are trickier, gifts from employers received the very day I was thinking of applying elsewhere. Compliments from co-workers, just minutes after conversations about how frustrating a project has been.

I'm seeing that I too am fighting this fight for loyalty as well. "You should check out this show, you'll love it." "This guy is awesome, you should listen to him." When I find something I like, I push it on folks. I wonder how that makes people feel. I'm tired of feeling pushed and pulled. I don't want to be the one pushing. There must be sincerity in it though. These friends care for me and want to protect me. These like having me around. I get so much enjoyment out of something that I don't want friends to miss out on it.

But there's something awful about it too. Its manipulative and it's wearing me out. Conversations become encoded messages and I leave probably decoding them wrongly, but either way tired from trying. Gifts for jobs well done come across as bribes. And I wonder where the truth lies.

I can't help but wonder if it isn't just better to let people find their own way, or is lack of involvement worse? I want to arrive at my own conclusions, to make my own discoveries, at the same time though, I wonder if no one was there beside me in the midst of it, if I'd just end up feeling worse. It's hard to let others find their own way. Trying to control things, or manipulating people, is easier than seeing them make mistakes or possibly being faced with mistakes of your own. What if one person's conclusions stand in opposition to your own... no one wants to be faced with the possibility that their conclusions weren't right.... myself included that's why I'm so tired of thinking about all of this. What if I've been wrong? Wrong about people, friends, all of it. There is a distinct possibility that I'm just flat wrong. And what's worse, I have no idea how to tell.

I can't say that I'm all that close with my family, but earlier today, for the first time, I wondered if the reason why is because they understand what Im talking about right now. They let me find my own way. I appreciate that, though I think this is the first time I've seen it that way. In the past I've interpreted it as them not caring enough to be involved, but I think I've been wrong about that too.

lots to come from Philly...

For a long time now I've only used this blog to post stupid videos, video's I'd been working on, or pretty much mindless strings of words that flowed out of boredom or frustration. Recently I've been thinking a lot, and I've had a lot of time to do it. I'm going to attempt, as several fellow bloggers and blog heroes / friends of mine have done before, to use a personal experience as a format to get out what's been brewing inside. In my case a recent trip to Philadelphia.

As anyone who has ever had more than a 3 minute conversation with me well knows, I have a hard time staying on topic. I'm in no way a linear guy; just don't think that way. I'm scattered. I start a sentence, only get out half the word, think of a better way to phrase the thought that my mind has already left in search of the follow up only to begin the sentence over three times before getting it out. And by the time it's finally out I'm busy chasing the rabbit that ran across some other synapses in my mind and I forget the original point that I was getting at. (the fact that I do this is not a recent discovery to me but rather a very well known and sometimes frustrating quirk) But usually somewhere along the rabbit trail, something I think of reminds me of my original thought and I'm back to square one....

All that to say... bear with me because I'm not going to tell this story in order... if indeed I tell it at all. I'm going to try and share, with all who care to read, my observations and the subsequent rabbit trails I find myself on during my time in Philadelphia (which was only a few days). I hope that makes some kind of sense... but true to form here's a better way of saying all that. I'm not going to give you the play by play of my time there because that wouldn't be any fun, but rather I hope to share what I experienced by being there. I'm so looking forward to writing about it all, and taking a little closer look at myself through it. I've avoided writing anything remotely personal on here for roughly a year now. I suppose a little self-disclosure is due.

put on you diapers...

cause this junk is funny.

last one I'll post...

I wasn't going to post it at all actually, but Ginny asked about the next installment... so look out internets... hope you can handle the traffic.



Its still not perfect... but the tracks are a lot more solid and the shots are way more complex. Maybe the folks at the festival will like it and you'll see a real deal version on tv this summer.

check it...again

I added a new shot... the second one (it took forever because of all the camera motion) and color corrected all of it.
Some of the tracks are still off, so if I get some time I may work on those a bit more too.

Thanks for all the comments so far.

little something I've been working on....

more to come in the way of writing later. but here's a work in progress that I'm working on for a few commercials....
its a big pic, click on if you want to see the detail.

absolutely beautiful....

http://www.onesize.nl/project.php?id=33

this is absolutely amazing. Its an experimental piece by one of my new favorite motion design houses. these guys are from the Netherlands too... which makes them double cool

SKYDIVE FACE SUKKA...

this is where I still live...

if I had a digital camera (other than the dandy one on my phone) I'd take a picture of my cheap one bedroom apartment and post it right on here so everyone could see it... but i don't because, as the would be picture of my apartment could show, I'm cheap but I digress.
Today after returning from work, at a reasonable hour for the first time in a while I might add, my land lord walked up to me and asked me if I was planning on renewing my lease. I'd been thinking about it for a while. The question of leaving is one that I tend to keep close. A lot of my friends are moving or have already moved. Others have interviews all over the place, or at least have interviews at different places here in town. But for me this spring doesn't seem to hold much in the way of big change. I moved last year, and shortly after changed jobs. Granted that move was only a few blocks and the change in jobs was fairly similar, but it felt like a lot. It seems like I can't go a single week without someone asking me when I'm going to leave Birmingham. I guess that's a hole I dug for myself. I talk about leaving, I really like the thought of it too, and I think I will someday, but I'm not so sure that day will be this year.
For the first time in 7 or 8 years (since my junior year of high school) I'll be living in the same place for more than 11 months in a row. I couldn't be happier about it. I get tired of it here, my job gets frustrating, I get lonely, I get mad at my church, basically I get bored, but I just don't feel like I've walked far enough down this road to get off of it yet.

I've got some more things to write about but seeing as how this is my first real post in several months, I guess I should ease back into it. So, taking note from my friend Su, I'll stop short and hopefully post again soon.

and people think graffiti writers are stupid...

i tend to disagree.

i don't know how old i am...

in recent conversations, about 3 or 4 of them actually, the topic of my age has arisen. each time when asked the question, "how old are you anyway?" i confidently answer 24... apparently that answer suits me since i've been giving it for the past 16 months. a little while ago while talking about a possible laptop purchase, i say, "if i get it, it better last me till i die." my friend responds in an imitation old man voice, "i've had this laptop since i was 25 years old." "silly girl..." I think to myself, "i'm only 24." then i say, "but i'm only 24" and she laughs, knowing the truth because our birthdays are in fact only a few days apart, and then informs me that i am 25. i realize that on my birthday this reality should have sunk in... but i was busy and for whatever reason it just didn't take. i feel like a different person now... i seem to have lost a year, that scares me.

so to all the people that i've recently had conversations with about feeling like an old 24 year old... there is more truth to that statement than i thought. i should work less.


(on a side note i think i remember writing something a few months ago on here about thinking like a normal 25 year old or something, so i suppose there are times when i realize my own age, but sadly those times are counteracted by months of obliviousness)

another update...

over the past week I've become aware, once again, of how fortunate I am to have the friends that I do. life's been a bit of a bummer for me lately. when Im in a funk like that, its a sho-nuff funk, and I tend to stay there feeling sorry for myself for a while. but the past week in particular my friends have been a great help in the unfunking process, and Im really thankful for that. one of the most exciting parts about it for me though is that in addition to my tried and true group of buddies, some of the unfunkers haven't been the usual suspects. one guy in particular, a 60-year-old co-worker, has been a great surprise. also old friends have entered again and I remember why I love them. it seems that just when I have decided that Ive been forgotten, Im shown that Im remembered. thats comforting.

on a side note for anyone who hasn't seen me in the last month... Im rockin a beard now.

till next month...

whats been happnin...

lotsa work is whats been happnin. thats why I haven't written in forever. i used to write in my down time at work, subsequently when there's no down time there's no writing. but... due to the fact that my office has now moved, and the internet service that we had at our old office, which is completely paid for by my boss, would not transfer from our old location to the new one, but would however transfer to my apartment, I can blog from the comfort of my own home, and all for free... at least free to me. other than work being crazy, the rest of my life feels crazy too. i think for the most part i bring it on myself. i sometimes wonder if i'll ever have the thought processes of a normal 25 year old human. i tend to stress myself out about everything, be over analytical, and not too much fun to be around... well i am those things at least in situations/contexts that i feel are serious or where a lot is at stake or that are just really important to me. that kind of sucks because then the things that are the most important or the closest to me cause me the most distress and i have the hardest time enjoying the things / people that i want to enjoy the most. as far as i can remember i've always been that way. recently though, i'm starting to see this as a fault, and wondering how to deal with it. maybe dr. phill has a website that i can check, again from the comfort of my own home, and without the judgmental glances of coworkers.

here's a video david showed me...

Stop Motion Battle

montly blog update...

I love Christmas. Always have, and even though my experience of it is changing because Im gettin old, I expect I'll always love it. I was at SouthTown last night setting up video equipment so the kids could watch a movie, eat popcorn, and drink hot chocolate. At least that was the plan. What actually happened was we set up the equipment the kids complained about the hot chocolate, asked for water instead, spilled all of the above on the floor, threw popcorn in the puddles, and fought with each other. Thats about what I expected so it really wasn't too big of a deal. There were a few kids though that watched the movie (the Santa Clause 2). There weren't any more chairs so Brandie and I sat in the floor... soon enough every single kid followed, all squeezing as close to her and me as they could. Then the kids started fighting and calling each other "you ol' nasty" and other various holiday names. The party in the floor soon came to an end, and that combined with the number of kids who had either become disinterested or sent home, left plenty of chairs for the rest of us good boys and girls. So we finished the movie. There was one scene that struck me... and I know that sounds ridiculous due to the fact that its Tim Allen as Santa Clause but still... there was some kind of party where all these grumpy adults were, and Santa (not looking like santa but still having special Christmas powers) was seeking to spread some Holiday cheer. Santa pulled out a sack of presents and started calling names. The adults were pretty hesitant but after a couple of them opened their gifts, which were vintage toys that they loved growing up, the crowd grew merry and the party turned into a big ol' love fest with all the adults playing "toss across" and "rock 'em sock 'em robots." The thing that hit me was this... its wasn't getting stuff that made the people happy, it was being known and understood. Maybe it was nostalgia, who knows? But I know when I get some dull old shirt or something like that for Christmas I don't feel warm and tingly. But when someone gives me something that captures a little piece of who I am... that gets me. The reason it gets me is because that gift is something tangible saying, "I know you well enough to know you'll understand." I think thats pretty swell.
Anywho there's my december update hope it'll tide you over to next year.

some high-points from my holiday...

(not necessarily in order of fantastic-ness)

1. learning a little about Flame...

2. watching "Walk the Line" with my dad... favorite lines by far...

"Mr. Cash your fans are Christians. They don't want to hear a record of you live from a prison, trying to cheer up murderers and convicts."

"Well, they must not be Christians."

3. realizing why I have a good relationship with Pop. We'd both much rather talk than watch TV... even if all we talk about is SEC football.

4. drinking beer with gene.

5. beating super mario brothers 1 (NES) in less than 8 minutes. yes, it can be done. the guys in the video below did it in less than 6. i've still got some work to do.

i'm learnin...

or at least i'm trying. i've got about 3 to 4 feet of manuals to read. i stopped counting pages, chapters, and volumes and started thinking in terms of the trusty ole english measurement system... and that stack doesn't include the numerous PDFs, help files, online tutorials, and user forums. it's pretty daunting, but it's fun. i met a guy that knows this stuff in and out. talking with him, seeing the stuff that he'd done, and hearing about what his friends were doing, has got me pretty motivated to learn this junk. he came in to help troubleshoot our new-top-of-the-line-ultra-swank system this week. i also found out that he is a programmer and is responsible for writing the code for some of the stuff that we will be using soon.
anyway in addition to learning all this software (smoke, flame, maya) now i'm seeing that if i want to really be on top of things i'm going to need to learn 2 more operating systems, and even a little bit of programming. so as i'm learning software, i'm having to wade my way through all the ins and outs of networking and filestructures of linux (not to mention making a linux box talk to the mac's and windows machines in the place) i really haven't had to deal with it much, my boss has though, and from seeing what he's gone through it don't look easy.
anyway all in all i'm having fun and am excited about being here. i actually got a call from my old art professor yesterday asking me to consider going to grad school at Penn State. honestly the prospect doesn't sound as appealing as what i'm doing now. i'm going to talk to him a little more about it though. i also don't think that i would cut the mustard in grad school. anyway here is some more cool stuff for anyone who would like to check out.

Shilo Design... these guys rule (check out the Huff show open)
Autodesk... makers of all things that are myserious to me.



this is a screenshot from flame...look interesting to anyone?